TGIM: The Truth, The Whole Truth, and Nothing But (Your) Truth

Welcome back to Thank God It’s Monday! Today I wanted to ask why you believe what you believe. Why do you hold the truths that you know as fact to be truth? I think most people generally want what is best for the greater good and for the utmost truth to prevail. I don’t think most people hold beliefs knowing that they are intentionally false or detrimental. But how many times have you been proven wrong about something that you used to swear was true? It’s a lesson we learn over and over again in life, but if we can learn how to be more receptive to other people’s truths, the world will be a more harmonious and productive place.

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tl;dr What you know to be true is actually just your perception of what is true based on your experiences. It’s true (to me) that dogs are the best but to some of you, it’s true that cats are. Asking yourself why you believe what you do helps reveal the experiences in your life that have shaped that truth. Consider why you feel so strongly about what you believe in.
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It probably started with Santa Claus or the tooth fairy for many of us. It was the first time in our young lives when an objective fact was turned on its head. What we knew to be absolute fact when we were five or six years old became a fictional tale when we were ten and twelve. But as we’ve grown up, there have been countless more occasions when what we once took as law evolves as we learn more about the world.

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As we learn we’re supposed to change our opinion of things. The more information you have the better your understanding is. We learn how gravity works so our understanding of what happens when we jump off of high surfaces changes. We learn about how exercise and eating affect our blood work so we change our routines. If you think about a lot of things you believed 10 years ago, hopefully, your opinion on many matters has changed as you’ve grown.

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The most successful people are actually particularly talented when it comes to adjusting their truths. They are inquisitive and constantly seeking to understand better. They want to know how they can run their business better and how they can develop a better product. This requires humility to accept that what they’re currently doing is not the best way and there exist methods to improve. This means unlearning what they once held as their highest standard.
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What is something that you hold as absolute truth? Maybe it’s how you align yourself with a political party or what you think about the best way to diet. A telltale sign of something that you hold as an absolute truth is that you get easily heated if someone brings up a counterpoint. You immediately jump into defensive mode to protect your own truth.

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When you think of an example, ask yourself why you know that to be true. What evidence do you have to support your argument? When you think of your supporting evidence, consider what is measurable and what is anecdotal. We often jump to what we’ve experienced as supporting evidence but consider that every person on this planet has had unique experiences that have shaped what they know to be true.
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For example, think about a person who has low self-esteem. This might’ve been you in the past or a close friend or family member. They hold this as a truth: that they are not smart enough or thin enough to fit a picture in their minds. When asked why they think things like this, they have supporting evidence too. They remember the time they didn’t get a job offer or when they didn’t fit in a dress at the store. They have experienced situations that make them feel inadequate so they continue to build this story in their head about how they will never be enough.
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It may sound silly from a third-party perspective but think about that person in your life you’ve known who has experienced this. It is an absolute truth to them and how they behave at work or in social groups reflects this belief. Unlearning this truth takes a tremendous amount of work.
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Similarly, we all hold beliefs that affect how we act at work or in social situations. Considering what our evidence is to support our case can help keep us inquisitive and growing.
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We all have been at a holiday dinner when that one family member starts their diatribe about their absolute truths and no one can get a word in edge-wise. When you’re feeling frustrated trying to numb the pain with extra dessert servings, remember that their experience in life has shaped that truth for them. Consider what aspects of your life you hold a truth that you are not easily swayed on and how you’ve built your case around it.
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A question to ask yourself this week is, “Why do I believe what I believe?” If you know that you’re a person who has tried everything for weight loss but the scale just won’t budge, why do you believe that? If you know that you’re bad at saving money, why do you believe what you believe? Then the key is to play devil’s advocate and build the argument against yourself. What reasons do you have to believe you’re wrong? What evidence supports the contrary?

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This will help you learn how to have more constructive conversations and improve your problem-solving skills. Learning how to see both sides of a truth will help you build healthier relationships and strengthen your creative abilities. You can grow your business, fortify your friendships, and improve your leadership skills. However, it takes humility, curiosity, and patience to learn to see past what you know as truth. So continue to ask yourself, “Why do I believe that?” to continue improving on the path to the best version of yourself.

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If you found some value in this, please share it with a friend you think would enjoy it! And let me know if you’d like to be added to get TGIM. Or visit https://walshwellness.weebly.com/ for older editions and if you’d like to subscribe.

This week, my podcast recommendation this week is from Rob Dial’s The Mindset Mentor, “The Truth Will Set You Free.” This episode talks about how our brains are often very good at tricking us into distorting reality which causes us to be stressed. Rob goes through the power of thinking clearly by getting out of our own way. If you like shorter, motivational podcasts this is a great episode for you!
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With that, have a wonderful week everyone! Get outside and enjoy the sunshine (and wear your sunscreen)! If you’re ever feeling stuck, anxious, or frustrated, the best remedy is movement and fresh air.

Until next time,

Shannon