TGIM: Hopeless Romantic

Welcome back to Thank God It’s Monday!

​

tl;dr In light of Valentine’s Day this past week, I thought it would be apropos to talk about love. But instead of the big Hallmarky love, the focus is on the subtle acts of love in our everyday lives. If we can become better at identifying the quiet moments of love, we may come to realize life is full of it.

​
Valentine’s Day loves to sell big romantic gestures: the roses, the presents, the pictures, the candy. This year, the holiday was projected to generate about $27.5 billion. And I love a heart-shaped Reese’s as much as the next person, but making this day synonymous with love is not doing love justice.

Love is abundant in small moments throughout the day. But if we don’t let ourselves be open to receiving it, we miss these opportunities and get overwhelmed by the frustrations in life. If both frustrations and love are pervasive and can direct the trajectory of our days, why not let love be the guiding force?
​

It sounds cheesy, I get it. But consider a few concrete examples. Think about the joy of laughing with a coworker or the first bite into your favorite dinner when you’re hungry. Or examine that feeling when you’re finally leaving for vacation after having a terrible week at work and have spent months planning your trip. Even contemplate the sensation when you take a warm shower after being freezing cold for hours. Pure bliss.

​
Love can show up in unexpected places. I was listening to an interview on a podcast this week about a woman whose ex-husband was dying of cancer, they were only in their 40s. After the funeral, they had a dinner to celebrate his life. She was surrounded by her kids playing with their cousins, her husband’s friends who were drinking beers, and her family who were laughing and sharing stories. In that moment, a horrible moment, she noticed the love she was surrounded by in the room.

​

Love is also in the little moments that bring you joy. I love the feeling of the sun on my skin (with sunscreen of course) and working in a coffee shop. I love watching someone’s face when they open a thoughtful present. I love the first night sleeping in my bed after a backpacking trip. I love a delicious, cold Coke Zero on a hot summer day (if you have something to say please refer to my TGIM: Diet Coke Discourse (https://walshwellness.weebly.com/tgim/diet-coke-discourse).
​

There are so many moments of love throughout the day. But consider the disproportionate reaction you typically have to little inconveniences versus the reaction you have to little positive events. We tend to harp on negative instances (like somebody cutting you off in traffic, your boss aggravating you, or your workout not going well). And when there’s a positive occurrence of a similar magnitude, you do not feel a proportionate amount of joy comparatively.

​

We have to work to find the love in our lives. Some of us are more genetically predisposed to notice the positive subtleties. Others have to practice looking for these moments. There are ways to practice strengthening this skill by catching yourself when a negative thought occurs and instead looking for a positive aspect to focus on. You can also implement a regular practice in your day either to start the day or end the day to recall three things you loved about your day. It may feel redundant but it helps train your brain on what to focus.

​

What an incredible privilege it is to love so much about the people, places, and opportunities around us. Love can be overwhelming and motivating. Love can drive change and spark creativity. It can change the trajectory of your day by noticing these small instances of love.

​

If you found some value in this, please share it with a friend you think would enjoy it! And let me know if you’d like to be added to get TGIM.
​

This week, my podcast recommendation is from Codi Sanchez’s Big Deal, “Wealth Expert: The New Rich Do These Things Daily.” This episode is not what you would anticipate from the title and was such a good listen!
​

With that, notice what wonderful things there are to love in your everyday life. The Reese’s hearts are wonderful once a year but for the other 364 days, there’s an abundance of love elsewhere.
​

Until next time,

Shannon