Welcome back to Thank God It’s Monday! This week I wanted to share a story from work this weekend. I work in an ICU which many of you know, and as you can imagine, I deal with a lot of life and death (and a lot of life and death situations). But this weekend was a particularly tragic story that I thought would be valuable to share in the hopes that we can all get a little bit more out of life and stop worrying about the little things. (A forewarning that if you are currently grieving a loved one maybe you can come back to this at a later time)
When our loved one goes to the hospital we expect that they can get specific tests to get clear answers and targeted treatments. That’s how Hollywood makes it look anyway. Dr. House orders obscure blood tests, guesses this crazy diagnosis, and tries an experimental treatment to cure Grandma miraculously. As usual, Hollywood doesn’t get it quite right.
Without getting on my soapbox, medicine is less of an exact science than you would imagine. It gets this glorified reputation about how smart everyone is and how impressive technology is, and to some extent that’s true. But it also is not perfect by any means (the people or the technology).
It’s kind of like how crime shows portray finding a culprit (which I’m sure Hollywood also wildly oversimplifies too). They look at the most likely suspects first and build a case for or against them. Either the most likely suspect is convicted of the crime, or they have to look further into the case. Then they find more obscure details about the crime scene, continue interviewing unsuspecting bystanders, and eventually get to the answer.
Similarly, in medicine, when a patient presents with symptoms (chest pain, shortness of breath, nausea, etc) we look at the most likely explanation for those symptoms. We do tests that would help confirm that diagnosis or rule it out. If the results come back to support this explanation then we can treat it. If the tests don’t confirm this diagnosis, then we can continue looking for more obscure answers.
So with that background information, we can look at the story from this weekend.
This middle-aged patient had been in the hospital for a few days with a pretty straightforward diagnosis. The treatment was simple, the patient was feeling better, and they were getting ready to go home. They were in the bathroom washing their hands (with the aide and nurse nearby), said they didn’t feel good, and collapsed. Unfortunately, we never got them back.
It was horrible. Even with all of the life and death we face in the hospital, it’s usually more anticipated or more understandable if a person in their 70s, 80s, or 90s passes away after a full life. This patient was middle-aged, with a spouse and young kids. We treated this patient for the symptoms they presented with, but all the while this other insidious thing was brewing, and unfortunately there was no way to know this would happen.
And I think about it from the perspective of the family. This patient was in the hospital. How could something like this happen in a hospital where you have all of the resources you’d need for this exact situation?
But sometimes these things just happen. Even with the best technology and doctors and PAs and nurses and aides, there was just nothing we could do. A massive unanticipated event happened, and it will forever change the lives of the patient’s partner and kids. It was heartbreaking.
So what can we take from this story to help us live our lives more fully?
It is a truly humbling reminder that life is so, so fragile. We should be so overwhelmed every waking moment that we are fortunate enough to be alive. It is so easy to get bogged down in the little annoyances in life and the miracle of life is so easily forgotten.
People think that being exposed to death so often must be challenging. While sometimes, like in this case, it can be very sad, most of the time it is a very healthy and humbling reminder to find the little things in life to rejoice in. It makes you grateful when other people can only find things to complain about.
Many cultures are much more comfortable with death than ours because they talk about it more and reflect on it differently. While I don’t think working around death is for everyone, I think everyone would benefit from paying it a little more mind. Coming to terms with our own mortality can be the most powerful motivator to live each day fully.
Let me know if this topic was a little heavy for you or if it helped you do a little reflecting about what is truly valuable for you and help you clarify your goals.
If you found some value in this, please share it with a friend you think would enjoy it! And let me know if you’d like to be added to get TGIM. Or visit https://walshwellness.weebly.com/ for older editions and if you’d like to subscribe.
This week my podcast recommendation is from The Tim Ferriss Show, “719: Walk and Talk with Greg McKeown-How to Find Your Purpose and Master Essentialism in 2024.” I really enjoyed the content of this episode and am always motivated by these talks. They say to surround yourself with people you strive to be like and I believe listening to podcasts is a great way to do just that.
With that, I do hope this edition brought you some value, and hopefully more positive than not. Our culture lends to us getting swallowed up in work and distraction, so death is a powerful reminder to redirect ourselves toward what really matters in life.
Until next time,
Shannon
View comments
+ Leave a comment